Meditate on This
It’s the early 1980’s, your typical hot and humid midwestern day. I’m sitting in the passenger seat of my parent’s dusky brown Chevy Chevette. The day is hot, scorching hot. I’ve been sitting in the car, waiting for my mom for what seems like an eternity. The heat is getting to me. To find some relief, I lean forward and begin cranking the handle to roll down the window. As I sit back, appreciating the damp yet balmy breeze, my young and curious eyes gravitate to the window crank that I just used. My attention is no longer consumed by the relentless heat but by this shiny, chrome window crank.
Sitting there, without movement, I unknowingly begin to meditate, with the crank being my subject. I see this object as nothing. No words form in my mind. I am without thought, without movement; my breath has slowed to an unobservable pace. There are no words to describe what I see; unspeakable emotions consume me. Lost in this hypnotic state, I am able to clearly see, feel and hear absolute purity, effortlessly.
At such a young age, my mind had yet to learn the word meditation. This seemingly random state of mind was a common occurrence for me. Often, I would ‘zone’ out and become consumed with indiscriminate, inanimate objects. I would see the ‘thing’ knowing what it was, but my mind dared not to name it.
I never gave any thought to these arbitrary muses of my mind until much later in life. As I grew older, my mind became less placid and more rigid in its thinking. Like most, I had become hardened with so many ‘knowns’ and ‘absolutes’ that any fluidity of thought quickly became crystallized. My mind had become robotic, created by decades of uninvited conditioning.
Conditioning of the mind deeply resides in the soul of all human beings and is an inevitable, yet necessary factor of existing. It may be inescapable, but to an inquisitive mind, it does not have to be a perennial aspect of life. A healthy mind thrives on wonder and curiosity, but all too often, we become trapped in our habitual thoughts. We forget what it’s like to have pure, free thought that is unobstructed by the noise of our conditioned, concrete minds.
I often revisit that hot, summer day and question — What if my remembrance was nothing more than a dream? How can a child, with little life experience, immerse themself into such a deep, meditative state without any guidance or motivation?
I believe the answer lies in the question. A child’s mind is extremely flexible; lacking in restraint and discipline. It is in this disordered state that true order resides. A whimsical mind is free to roam and experience the world as it is — no truths, no absolutes — just pure observation.
